I am feeling down-in-the-dumps today.
As I sit here and do my breathing treatments, for the third time today, I feel sorry for myself. I hate that it seems as though my life revolves around my health. I hate Cystic Fibrosis. I am tired of treatments, I am tired of pills, I am tired of coughing, stomach cramps, chest pains, fatigue, aching joints...getting short of breath just chasing my kids.
As I sit here alone at my own pity-party, I remember a song that I heard earlier today on the radio.
"What if there’s a bigger picture?
What if I’m missing out?
What if there’s a greater purpose I could be living right now?
Outside my own little world."
Matthew West
How could I be so wrapped up in my own misery, if I can even call it that? I am so blessed. Blessed beyond belief.
I have a wonderful husband (who I am madly in love with), two gorgeous children that fill my heart with an abundance of joy, a wonderful family and friends (might I add that I have the best and most supportive parents and grandparents in the world) and most importantly,
a God who loves me for me. He loves me just the way I am.
How could I not smile when I think of all the wonderful-ness (is that even a word?!) in my life!
I want to step outside my own little world. This world is not only about me. There is a much greater picture that I close myself off from at times.
I think that sometimes I so selfishly get caught up in my own burdens that I forget that I really do have the power to impact others with love...even if it is just sharing a smile.
I am not here for my purpose, I am here for God's purpose.
I am not feeling so down anymore, after all...my life is not all that horrible. Come to think of it, I wouldn't change a thing.
